Reviewer Profile: em_fiction

em_fiction's Bio

I'm not a very demanding person in the cinema, but at the same time I have very limited taste. I tend to have more respect for films that are based on art but have a decent sense of realism and originality. I love non-linear crap or films that explore more than one perspective. I love the stuff that makes no sense at all but nonetheless has meaningful artistic merit. I love the stuff that can make sense but is just structured in such a confusing manner that your head might explode while watching it. I also love fast-paced action or comedy that's witty and intelligent. And I love anything by Disney/Pixar.

My favourite films, in no particular order — Pulp Fiction (1994), Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991), Ghost World (2001), Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998), Toy Story (1995), Lost in Translation (2003), Punch-Drunk Love (2002) and Memento (2000). Ah yes, and who can forget David Lynch. Ever seen Mulholland Dr. (2001)? It's like trying to solve a Rubik's cube with missing colour codes. Or putting together a jigsaw puzzle with broken pieces. "It's a strange world." Yes, it is indeed.

Reviewer statistics

Number of reviews:   86 Number of ratings:   129 Average rating:   7.12 Lowest rating:   1 (for Scary Movie 2 (2001), The Master of Disguise (2002)) Highest rating:   10 (for 21 Grams (2003), Fight Club (1999), Ghost World (2001), Kill Bill: Volume 2 (2004), Lost in Translation (2003), Magnolia (1999), Memento (2000), Mulholland Dr. (2001), Punch-Drunk Love (2002), Se7en (1995), The Killer (1989), The Shawshank Redemption (1994))

Rating   Percentage 1     2% 2     3% 3     5% 4     4% 5     6% 6     12% 7     13% 8     28% 9     18% 10     9%

Last 5 reviews written by em_fiction

View all reviews by em_fiction

Last 5 comments written by em_fiction

1. Paulie,

   Fuck off.

   Best wishes and lots of love,
   Mac

   A comment about Nine Lives (2004) on Tue 19 Apr 2005 21:04 #

2. I guess so, Luis. We did miss the point. But we're only human. We don't know everything. We certainly don't believe that we have the definitive say on anything, either. "Try to shove to you any of their imbecilic sutff"? Mate, believe it or not, no one has to show either of our reviews any regard whatsoever. We're entitled to our opinions - YOU can't say that we're "up our own a**es" because we weren't lucky enough to enjoy it as much as you. I wanted to like this film quite badly, because I love Pixar, but I just couldn't. I just didn't like it. Not everyone loves this film. Live with it.

   A comment about Boundin' (2003) on Tue 19 Apr 2005 18:48 #

3. Thank you for your advice, Cornelius, but I know my reviews are shit. I know I'm not a very credible reviewer. Their poor quality says a lot about my credibility: I have none. But something important you don't understand is that I don't care. Bad writing is my pastime. If you're looking for well-written constructive reviews, go to David Stratton or Roger Ebert. This site is just a bunch of mates talking shit. THAT'S ALL. If you don't like it, then please don't come here. And congratulations, Paulie, on your award. My opinion doesn't mean shit to you? Well, you sure seem keen on passionately inundating the reader comments, whining about how much my review has upset you and all your mates. If it genuinely "doesn't mean shit" to you then please, feel free to just fuck off.

   A comment about Nine Lives (2004) on Tue 19 Apr 2005 18:21 #

4. I'm glad my reviews are finally getting to people. I'm actually incredibly surprised at how much you guys actually care about my opinion. The Couch Potato guy didn't seem to take my review as seriously. I've said this to many other readers before and I'll say it again: learn what a fucking review is. A review is ONE opinion. One opinion that, in fact, doesn't have to matter AT ALL, unless you want it to, which you all seem quite keen on. I can appreciate the effort of Jamie but I can't help it if I was bored out of my fucking mind. And who am I to rain on your parade? Are you (Jamie) honestly that upset that some random, anonymous and most likely purblind so-called reviewer has said a few bad things about your film? If you can't take negative criticism, you're not fit to make any kind of film. You're offended I reviewed it? Mate, you might be proud of your film but no film is too good to be reviewed. I'm not a crash-hot filmmaker, reviewer or site maker for that matter, so I agree with all the non-physical, non-sexual derogatory feedback you made about me, particularly the colourful paulie, but seriously, if you feel that strongly about my review, I suggest you simply don't read any more of them.

   A comment about Nine Lives (2004) on Mon 18 Apr 2005 18:23 #

5. When Pixar makes a bad feature film, I will most likely cry. The shorts I don't really care about though, so this bad rating was actually a lot easier to give than I thought.

   In response to ana_D: sweetheart, do you know what a reviewer's job is? It's not to make a better film. It's simply to judge based their own opinions. Tell me where it says in the big reviewer's manual that a reviewer may not give a negative review unless the reviewer can produce a film of equal or higher standard, and I'll stop. I promise.

   A comment about Boundin' (2003) on Sun 27 Mar 2005 00:05 #

Last 5 movies seen by em_fiction

Friends & foes

em_fiction agrees most with:

andy-j (average rating difference: 1.1)

em_fiction disagrees most with:

citizenjoe (average rating difference: 1.3)

To appear in these statistics, reviewers must have reviewed at least 4 movies together.

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