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Reviewer Profile: andy-j

Real name: Andrew Jacobs

andy-j's Bio

When it comes to movies, I'm pretty easily pleased really.. I'm not fussy at all. I find watching movies a great way to relax, and I generally love all types of films - probably because I don't need much more than a reasonable plot to keep me entertained. I know nothing about cinematography, don't think about underlying themes, and wouldn't know character development if it punched me in the mouth. I also know little to nothing about the art of acting, and while I can recognise brilliant acting, I have never really been able to figure out what constitutes "bad" acting. So you probably won't catch me saying too much about those things unless they really stand out.

I'm not trying to set the world on fire with my reviews. They're basically fairly shallow, surface-scratching affairs. I have neither the filmography knowledge, nor the life experience to go beyond that level at this stage, so I won't even pretend to do so. I'm just going to comment on what strikes me about a film - nothing more, nothing less. But I do think about it, and I do try. I'm hoping that the act of forcing myself to think about what did/didn't appeal to me about a film will eventually improve my movie-reviewing skills. Don't hold your breath though...

I just wrote a review for Chopper (2000) then checked out some of the "real" reviews on the web and concluded I have all of the insight and literary skills of a five year old in comparison. So, if you are expecting something like "Dominik is at once specific yet metaphoric in his approach to creating atmosphere and social ambience, so that we are drawn in but also prompted to observe" then you might be disappointed with my equivalent: "This movie was good until I spilled my popcorn everywhere and some of it went down my pants and made me all itchy". So be warned!

Reviewer statistics

Number of reviews: 105
Average rating: 6.66
Lowest rating: 1 (for AVPR: Alien vs Predator - Requiem (2007), Meet the Spartans (2008), Walking Tall (2004))
Highest rating: 10 (for About Schmidt (2002), Alien (1979), Boogie Nights (1997), Dawn of the Dead (2004), Donnie Darko (2001), Rain Man (1988), Spirited Away (2001), The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003), The Shawshank Redemption (1994), The Sixth Sense (1999), Tootsie (1982), Waiting for Guffman (1996))
 
Rating Percentage
1 
 3%
2 
 5%
3 
 9%
4 
 6%
5 
 9%
6 
 11%
7 
 12%
8 
 16%
9 
 18%
10 
 11%

Last 5 reviews written by andy-j

DateMovieRatingSummaryAverage
Tue 1 Apr 2008AVPR: Alien vs Predator - Requiem (2007)1I saw this movie. Then I woke up. It was all a nightmare! THE END.
Why do I even give movies like Alien vs Predator 2: Requiem a chance? Part of me is so in... (more)
1.00 (1 rating)
Fri 28 Mar 2008Meet the Spartans (2008)1"Gimme a cheddar burger man" film-making at its finest
Meet the Spartans is basically a bunch of very unfunny popular culture references thrown together into a thankfully short 80-odd... (more)
1.00 (1 rating)
Fri 24 Aug 2007The Invisible3HUH?
Nick Powell is your typical sulky and cynical teenager who pulls no punches and has decided that he is fed... (more)
3.00 (1 rating)
Wed 14 Mar 2007Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby8Did that just blow your mind? That just happened!
This really isn't my kind of film at all. I saw the previews and thought it looked awful. It was... (more)
8.00 (1 rating)
Tue 5 Sep 2006The Cave2This review is better than the film
A troop of expert cave divers team together with cutting-edge scientists to explore an extensive network of newly-discovered underground caves.... (more)
2.00 (1 rating)

View all reviews by andy-j

Last 5 comments written by andy-j

  1. And now I read that AVP killed both James Cameron AND Ridley Scott's interest in making Alien 5. Nice one! In my opinion this makes Paul W.S Anderson the worst filmmaker in the entire industry. Who the hell keeps giving him the budget to make this shit? Satan?

    A comment about AVP: Alien Vs. Predator (2004) on Sat 15 Jul 2006 00:04 #

  2. As stated in my profile, I have no credentials, nor have I ever pretended to have any. I think this site makes that very clear. I'm just a member of the public who sees movies and comments on whether I like them or not. I hardly think that I'm on any kind of pedestal.

    I'm also not "inflicting" my reviews upon you, or upon anyone else. If you don't like them, don't read them. Please don't take this so seriously. I don't.

    Thanks for the feedback.

    A comment about Rock Fresh (2004) on Wed 11 Jan 2006 11:46 #

  3. "finally a bunch of kids went out there and did what they wanted to do"

    Doesn't that sort of thing happen like... all the time all over the world?

    A comment about The Real Cancun (2003) on Fri 23 Dec 2005 23:52 #

  4. Whooo!!! I misspelt the word 'small' and I'm never going to change it!

    A comment about Sixteen Candles (1984) on Wed 20 Jul 2005 01:16 #

  5. Hey! Whats with the raspberry? I didn't write the script! I just UNDERSTOOD it :P

    A comment about Batman Begins (2005) on Mon 04 Jul 2005 15:25 #

Last 5 movies seen by andy-j

DateMovieMy RatingReviewsAverage
Thu 22 Jan 2004Cane-Toad: What Happened to Baz? (2002)5Read Reviews4.33 (3 ratings)
Tue 20 Jan 2004Phone Booth (2002)8Read Reviews7.50 (2 ratings)
Sat 10 Jan 2004Gacy (2003)3Read Reviews2.50 (2 ratings)
Mon 5 Jan 2004About Schmidt (2002)10Read Reviews9.33 (3 ratings)
Sun 4 Jan 2004Bad Eggs (2003)5Read Reviews7.00 (3 ratings)

Friends & foes

andy-j agrees most with:
em_fiction (average rating difference: 1.1)
andy-j disagrees most with:
pearly (average rating difference: 1.4)

To appear in these statistics, reviewers must have reviewed at least 4 movies together.